Wild Wednesday!

I told you Spring Break was filling up, right? Yesterday the boys and I spent the day at my friend Maria's house and visited my grandma in the hospital.

Today and tomorrow I've temporarily gained 3 children during the day. I'm watching my cousin's kids (Amanda & Jordan), as well as their friend Luke who flew in from CA for the week. I'm actually going to use it to my benefit. Since the two older kids are 13, I can leave them "in charge" for a short period of time to go run some errands. Plus my boys are very happily engaged in play for the next two days. The noise level in the house gets quite high at times, but I think the tradeoff is worth it.

In the past 4 days I have had two friends who have been an incredible blessing to me and the boys... because of them, I was able to pay all of my bills in cash today. You two have no idea how huge that is for me and just how much you have been Jesus to us. I think often of the day when it will be me who is able to reach out to single moms and help them in very tangible ways. It is a strong desire of my heart.

Last Thursday I was taking time to sit and do my devotions. I am embarrassed to say that it had been a little while since I had taken the time to just sit with God like that. Because of that, I was feeling extremely guilty as I started praying to Him. Have you ever felt that way?.... I prayed a little and then opened my Bible to read. I was really craving the Word. I opened to where my little ribbon was marking the last place I had read in that particular Bible (I have a few that I use). It was Isaiah 41. Verses 9, 10 and 13 jumped out at me because I had them underlined in red. They said:

I took you from the ends of the earth, from its farthest corners I called you. I said, 'You are my servant'; I have chosen you and have not rejected you. So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand. For I am the LORD, your God, who takes hold of your right hand and says to you, Do not fear; I will help you.

I was immediately emotional and just felt God's love for me. My guilt slipped away...

I continued reading and was again moved when I came to verses 17 - 20:

The poor and needy search for water, but there is none; their tongues are parched with thirst. But I the LORD will answer them; I, the God of Israel, will not forsake them. I will make rivers flow on barren heights, and springs within the valleys. I will turn the desert into pools of water, and the parched ground into springs. I will put in the desert the cedar and the acacia, the myrtle and the olive. I will set pines in the wasteland, the fir and the cypress together, so that people may see and know, may consider and understand, that the hand of the LORD has done this, that the Holy One of Israel has created it.

I believe with my whole heart that this is God's promise to me... that He is going to provide a way to take care of the boys and me in a way that will leave no doubt that it could have only been Him. I have no idea who or what He will use to do that. I have no idea if that means answering Drew's prayer that I will get "100 clients", or if that means another job or means of income, or if it is something I couldn't even begin to dream up. But I do know what He's promised me and that He always keeps His promises.

Until that day, my heart cannot begin to express enough gratitude for those of you who have stood in the gap for us and have given of your own means to help us through this time. Your reward in Heaven will be great!

Post-Easter

Yesterday was a wonderful day for us. So wonderful that I didn't even stop to take pictures. It was nice just to live in the moment and enjoy it. We spent the majority of the day with Michael's family. It was one of the best Easter's I've had in a long time.

In the last couple of years, these Resurrection Eggs have become one of my favorite Easter traditions. Every year Drew uses them to tell the Easter story multiple times in the days leading up. Yesterday he had quite the captive audience when Val (Michael's aunt) had everyone sit in a circle in the living room so Drew could tell the story. Every year he tells some part of the story a little funny, although he gets more and more accurate as he gets older. (Bummer!) This year's funny part had to do with Jesus riding the donkey into Jerusalem. The way Drew told it, the people were waving "pom pom branches". Next year Nick should be able to tell the story. That'll be fun!

Thursday was such a nutty day for me.... one of those days where my frustration level was very high, my head hurt and I wanted to strangle someone. It started when I had to spend 2 1/2 hours on the phone with Verizon trying to get my internet connection to start working again. That in and of itself is enough to drive a person batty. Then my downstairs phone battery died. And the upstairs one needed to be recharged. Something else happened too, but I think I've mostly managed to block it all out. Thankfully the day got better and better as it went on.

Saturday Michael & I (and the boys, and his parents) looked at another house. It was a gorgeous house in a gorgeous (very remote) setting in the hills; however, it had just as many negatives as it did positives.

The boys helped Michael fix our gates and that night Michael & I watched "The Passion of the Christ" after the boys were in bed. I couldn't handle watching that movie very often because it is so intense, but this year I just really wanted to remember what Easter is all about.

Things are really hopping for the April wedding I'm doing. Call me crazy, but I love it... I relish all of the organizational aspects!

Today I hand-delivered a letter to someone who is going to be having a huge Grand Opening in a few months. My dad gave my business a "plug" yesterday with this person and so I wanted to follow up ASAP to see if I could land them as a client. If I do, it will be huge. I realize that I am being very vague here and that is on purpose. I hesitate to divulge my leads publicly until it has been decided whether or not they will come to fruition. That's the same reason I didn't divulge the identity of the wedding site manager I met with a week and a half ago who is considering me as their preferred Wedding Planner.

It's officially the start of Spring Break today! I wondered what I would do to keep the kids from getting bored all week, but my week has quickly filled up already. How did that happen???? Right now the boys are happily playing downstairs with Jordan (my cousin's son). They're playing some kind of Transformer/Dinosaur/Boxing/Shooting make-believe with a little of the Easter story thrown in for good measure. I love their imaginations!

Too Much To Update!

I'm not even sure where to begin, so here's the best condensed version I can give....
Gary, Khonda, the kids, and Khonda's parents arrived on Thursday and stayed through Monday. We had a great time, but the day that stood out the most for everyone was Sunday. After church and lunch everyone went up to Michael's. We gave tours of Michael's place and the view from Craig & Vickie's, then Gary, Khonda and her parents went to tour the wineries nearby.

The kids stayed with Michael & I and had a blast playing... ... in a bucket of water,




... in the dirt,

... and on the four-wheeler. Michael took all the kids for rides, then let Brock and Makenna each go off on their own.

When the adults returned, Gary took his turn playing on the four-wheeler as well. When all was said and done, Gary & Brock ended up wearing some of Michael's sweats because their pants got so muddy.

After all the fun outside, the group moved indoors. Michael & I set out all kinds of snacks while everyone played games. We had a big pizza dinner and then sprawled all over the living room to watch "Facing the Giants".

It was a great day.

And a great weekend with family.

I have been extremely busy now that I'm working with two brides. They are both so wonderful; it makes my job fun.

I have also been networking like crazy... met with a cake designer on Thursday, a wedding venue on Friday, another wedding venue on Monday (where it looks like I will be their preferred Wedding Planner!!!!.... more details to come!), and a great DJ yesterday who may likely be my best contact yet. He is one of the top DJ's and came prepared to give me all kinds of helpful info and books for our line of work, as well as referrals.

So now, my friends, I think you are all caught up for the moment. Back to work for me!

Girl Talk

If you're not a girl, you might just want to skip this particular post. No, seriously, just click on to another site. I'm not kidding. OK, all of you of the male gender, please know that you've been given fair warning at this point...

OK, girls, here's the deal... because I no longer have health insurance, I could no longer afford to continue taking "The Pill". I ran out a couple of months ago and figured that it would be just fine, that whatever symptoms the Pill had been regulating would be minimal and easy to adjust to. Not so, my friends!

I do remember (pre-Pill) dealing with pain and nausea and other girlie-symptoms I won't get into. However, I've never (at least not to my recollection) had to deal with hormonal (i.e., emotional) issues at "that time of the month". Imagine my surprise when my hormones went all out of whack on Tuesday. I was a basket case. If you looked at me wrong, I would cry. If you talked to me, my hormones misinterpreted most things you said before they reached my brain.... and I would cry. If you didn't talk to me, I would cry. If you said something nice to me, I would cry. I WAS NUTS!!!

Poor Michael... I think I about scared the bejeebers out of him! He was about ready to run for the hills and never look back. He didn't know how to handle me or how to take it or what to do. He really got the brunt of it. When I think back over Tuesday, Wednesday & Thursday, there are so many nothings I made into somethings. Wow! It's really, truly crazy. Thank goodness he's a forgiving man.

The worst part of it is that you know what you're doing, but you're helpless to stop it. At least I felt that way.... perhaps because I had no prior experience in knowing how to handle such out-of-control emotions. For those of you who have to deal with that on a regular basis, what do you do???? I need some practical advice! I don't want to be a crazy person a couple of days out of every month. How do you combat hormones when they take over?? Any creative solutions? There has to be something! I really don't want to be that person again.... I had a hard time dealing with myself, so I can only imagine how it affected Michael & the boys and any other unsuspecting victims.

Thankfully I woke up this morning with everything back to normal. The real Becky returned and whoever that other person was went away. I can't tell you how good it feels today to be "normal" again. I'd like to think that the hormonal imbalance was a one-time freak occurrence. And yet I'd also like to be prepared for next month just in case.

Can any of you help me?.... I'm open to any and all suggestions!

Honored

Yesterday I received an invitation to the April wedding of the daughter of a friend from church. I emailed my friend to ask if they would like to use my services as a Wedding Planner for the day of the wedding as my wedding gift to her daughter & future son-in-law. Today she excitedly accepted my offer.

I too am excited! I'm excited to be able to "give back" to my friend after she was there for me in so many ways, I'm excited to help all of them out so that they are able to fully enjoy the celebration, and I'm excited for the opportunities to add one more wedding to my portfolio and to be able to work with the local vendors. Plus, the wedding is in the downtown Ballroom which is where I was itching to be able to do a wedding. I feel very honored to be able to help with this wedding. Honored and excited!

Now it's back to cleaning... Gary and his family arrive Thursday and are staying through Tuesday.

Turkeys!

This morning I went over to the elementary school across the street... a few of you had scared me sufficiently into thinking that I was "very late" in registering Drew for kindergarten in the fall, even though I had never seen anything advertised. Thankfully I was told that the city-wide "Kindergarten Round-Up" is not until early May. Whew!! The office lady told me to tell my family and friends to stop scaring me. So you have now officially been ordered to "Stop it!"

We drove across the street back home and I stopped to get out and get the mail. As I did I noticed a band of eight turkeys (yes, TURKEYS!) meandering down the street together toward downtown. They were very nonchalant as though they were just out for a morning stroll. I have no idea where they came from or where they were going. Perhaps they're on an exercise regime to help guarantee that they will be too skinny to end up on anyone's Thanksgiving table later this year.

Nazarene Naps

When we were growing up, my parents took a nap every Sunday afternoon... Nazarene Naps, we called them. As kids we just didn't get why an adult would want to sleep away a perfectly good afternoon. As adults, we get it!!

Today was one of those days where I just hit the wall. Yes, I stayed up too late last night even though I knew it was the day we all lost an hour of sleep. But it was more than that. Every once in a while being a single mom catches up with me and the feeling of sleepiness just slams me. Today was one of those days. I couldn't even complete a sentence that made sense. I was that tired.

So after church, and after the boys played at Jordan's for a couple of hours, Michael had me bring them to his house. We then transported them to Craig & Vickie's where they had so graciously agreed to watch the boys for 2 hours while I napped and he worked. He even picked up the boys for me and played with them outside at the pond for an extra half hour just to be sure I got all the sleep I needed. I woke up feeling so refreshed and ready to enjoy what's become our almost weekly Sunday ritual of dinner & a movie at Michael's for the four of us.

Yesterday morning Michael & I (along with his parents & their best friends) were treated to an AWESOME breakfast by the elderly lady in our church whose kitchen Michael recently remodeled. She wanted to show off his work! She was hilarious the whole time we were there. She even revealed that she has a cataloged, alphabetized box filled with obits of people she knows. We were dying laughing. She lost her husband out of the blue last year, but lives her life in such joy and laughter. I want to be just like that when I'm her age!

P.S.
This morning I got to write a tithe check for the first time in a long time. It felt so good!!

Strange Phone Calls

It's kind of cool to start getting business calls. I'm needing to remember to answer my cell with, "No Ordinary Affair, this is Becky", instead of just, "Hi, this is Becky." Although perhaps I would get fewer strange calls by forgetting to add my business name....

Here are but a few of my favorites:

... today a lady called wanting to know if I would go sing "Happy Birthday" to her daughter at work up near Portland.

... two days ago, one half of a lesbian couple (who I remember distinctly from the Mac Bridal Fair) called to ask me if I knew anyone who performed Domestic Partnership ceremonies. She said she knew they couldn't do it in a church because "they're weird about that".

... a couple of months ago a lady called to have me settle a dispute between her and her ex-fiance over who got to keep the engagement ring now that the engagement was broken. She didn't like the "etiquette" answer, but was happy with the legal answer (the two answers happened to contradict one other in her situation). She felt the need to go into great detail about why they had broken up, as well as the day they bought the ring.

Oh, well. Gives a little spice to my day, I guess.

Life as a Wedding Planner

Isn't this a great picture of Michael & me? What??..... you don't think it looks just like us?.....

Well, I am on Day 2 as an officially paid Wedding Planner and I am having the time of my life. (I know all you girls out there are jealous, so don't pretend otherwise!) This is an absolute blast. Now I just need more clients.

You know what's funny? I spent a considerable amount of time going out to meet vendors in the past 8 months. For a while I concentrated primarily on wedding/reception sites, not only because it was the logical place to start, but also because there were some wedding vendors who didn't see a need to meet me since I didn't yet have business to throw their way.

Not so now! Now the vendors I'm calling are asking to meet me in person. So far next week I am meeting a Custom Cake lady for coffee (she told me to come hungry because she's making me all kinds of samples of her cake to taste), and I'm meeting a DJ in Salem for either coffee or lunch. Both are stay-at-home parents (as well as being very highly recommended in their field), so I am more than happy to throw business their way. The Cake-maker used to work closely with a Wedding Planner who moved, so she is now interested in developing an exclusive relationship with me. It would be awesome if the DJ is thinking along the same lines.

Out of the blue, Matt asked to pick the boys up after lunch and keep them overnight, so that has given me this afternoon and most of tomorrow to work uninterrupted.

I am thinking of starting a wedding blog for my business site. Long story, but for now I feel like God is calling me to put the devotional site on hold. Maybe He just wants me to concentrate wholeheartedly on my business.

The sun is shining and it's a beautiful day..... Soon I get to leave to go by Staples (for business supplies!) and then to Michael's where he's making us a steak dinner and we're watching American Idol together.

Am I blessed or what?

My First Client!!!!!

Just look at what I am holding in my hand.... my very first check from a client!!!

I got a call yesterday from this couple who recently got engaged and is getting married June 7th. They saw my ad in the Bridal Guide and, realizing what they are up against trying to plan a summer wedding on such short notice, they decided they needed a wedding planner.

I met with them this morning at my house, we negotiated a price based on their needs, they wrote me a check for 2/3's and we're off and running.

Speaking of running, I have a heck of a lot to do to coordinate vendors for them ASAP. Better get to work!

Isn't God good??! Perhaps I'm starting to emerge from the Waiting Room?.....

Woo Hoo!!! This is a blast.

God's Waiting Room

Some of you are wondering, "So, did she get the job??"....

I had a wonderful second interview Friday morning and was confident that I had the job in the bag. So confident, in fact, that I had my childcare all arranged for tomorrow and my mom & I were working on a plan for a one-week Victimology class I was going to be required to attend later this month in Salem. However, the Executive Director called me Friday afternoon to let me know that they had offered the job to the other final candidate. She was extremely apologetic and wanted to let me know that my interviews were wonderful and there was nothing I could have said or done differently. She said it was the hardest decision they'd ever had to make and that they actually spent some time trying to see if they could possibly come up with a job-share scenario, or even create a new position for me. But they're non-profit, so who's kidding, right? In the end it came down to the other person having a little more experience than me.

When I hung up the phone, my first reaction was to laugh. It's been 12 long months of job-hunting and interviewing for me. Twelve months of seeing jobs that don't pay enough to cover my childcare expenses, and twelve months of being rejected in every interview I've been in. Twelve months of making it to a final interview and still being overlooked. Twelve months of bidding on at-home jobs that go to another bidder. And eight months of trying to get clients for my business.

For some reason God is closing every single door in my face. I'm at a loss to explain why. I'm confused and fighting to not allow the feeling of desperation to gain a foothold. God is silent while I live every day being only a day away from losing everything and having not one penny to my name to take care of my family's basic needs.

After Friday's phone call, I figured it was good that I was on my way to a Christian comedy concert with my friend Chonda Pierce. I knew the timing wasn't coincidence.

Chonda and I became friends in '94 or '95 and had fun for many years. We emailed each other, stayed at each other's homes on occasion, and met up at numerous concert locations where I would help her. We have many fun memories of laughing, talking and playing together.

About 6 or 7 years ago we lost touch. On her end, her career took off and keeping up with email became a luxury. On my end, I was also newly married and busy with life. So I looked forward to having this opportunity to reconnect with her.

I didn't have high expectations on reconnecting. I knew I'd only have a very few moments during intermission when about 15 fans were also vying for her time and attention. However, she came right over to me and gave me a great big hug. We had a little "reunion", as she called it, for about 5 minutes before she turned her attention to the rest of the room. It was sweet sharing a moment with my friend. I asked about Doris; she asked about Debbie. She scolded me for not having pics of my boys to show her. I promised to email them to her.

But God used my friend in yet another way that night. He used something Chonda said from the stage. She talked about the times in our lives when we are in God's Waiting Room.... those times when He is totally silent and it appears as though He's not working, or not listening. We want God to work NOW.... but He's God and He's not going to work until He's good and ready. During those times we tend to put on a good front and try to make it look like He's working when He's not.... as though we have to protect God's reputation or something. But like Chonda said, look around.... His reputation is just fine. He doesn't need us pretending in order to make Him "look better". He wants us to be honest and real with each other. No pretending. And He also wants us to trust Him.

So this is me.... stuck in God's waiting room. I don't know how long I'll be here, or how in the world I will get through financially. All I can do is to continue to seek work, continue to market my business, and continue to pray for direction. The rest is God's responsibility. And He'll do something about it when He's good and ready.

Until then, I will need your encouragement. A lot. And often.

And while I sit in this waiting room of His, I know that I also need to be looking for the reasons He has me here. What am I supposed to be doing? What am I supposed to be learning?

One of those answers may just be found in this book. My mom loaned it to me. She got it because she heard it was good. Turns out that many churches are using this book in their small groups.... and many bookstores are banning this book because it challenges so many of our preconceptions about God.

It's that good.

I'm only halfway through it and already I am amazed at how my thinking and perception of God has changed. Tami (Michael's sister) and Judy (his mom's best friend) and I had a great discussion about this book on the long ride home from Friday night's concert. Judy's read the book, and Tami is about as far into it as I am.

It's pretty incredible. And although I'm not yet finished with it, with endorsements from people like Michael W. Smith, Eugene Peterson and Wynonna Judd, I feel safe in telling you this: Run out today and beg, borrow and steal to get your hands on a copy!!!